Faceless Friends

thelurker66

Member
Feb 28, 2024
3,559
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113
@Muggle can you do tomorrow at all babe as just had a call about our relative being rushed to hospital with another suspected heart attack 😭😭 They have taken them to whiston hospital for some reason too 😣😢
On route to the hospital now as been told we have to go in. Only found out last night the cancer has spread even more in the liver

Also think me and hubby are going to have to cancel Barcelona which I’m not bothered about because family always come first. Don’t even care if insurance don’t pay out either for it.
I’m gutted about today and will update you all later xxxxx
Sending you a big virtual hug Jo
I hear Barcelona is soon to be invested with the smell of cat piss anyway! So maybe a blessing in disguise!
 

itsmedvlajo

Member
Mar 12, 2024
658
7,435
93
Costa del Southport
Hey everyone, not got all blood results back yet as waiting on TROP T levels. They think the new chemo drug has caused this and the reason they took them to Whiston is because the cancer specialist is based there. H/R is fluctuating between 133-160, Sats are 64% and B/P sky high too.
I can’t say who the relative is because it would give away who I am but they have just signed a DNR as advised it would be detrimental to them and would have no life with the damage it would cause. They weigh 40kg and literally just skin over bones 😢😭
Tbh relative is saying they will discharge themselves and if they are going to pass they want to be at home 😭😭😭
 

thelurker66

Member
Feb 28, 2024
3,559
32,617
113
Hey everyone, not got all blood results back yet as waiting on TROP T levels. They think the new chemo drug has caused this and the reason they took them to Whiston is because the cancer specialist is based there. H/R is fluctuating between 133-160, Sats are 64% and B/P sky high too.
I can’t say who the relative is because it would give away who I am but they have just signed a DNR as advised it would be detrimental to them and would have no life with the damage it would cause. They weigh 40kg and literally just skin over bones 😢😭
Tbh relative is saying they will discharge themselves and if they are going to pass they want to be at home 😭😭😭
Oh Jo 🥺🥺🥺
Sending you the biggest virtual hug! I wish I could do more!
As sad as it is I know they will have some sense of relief knowing they’ve made their wishes known, I guess it gives them some control in a really heartbreaking situation 😔
We are all here for you ❤️❤️❤️
 

itsmedvlajo

Member
Mar 12, 2024
658
7,435
93
Costa del Southport
Oh Jo 🥺🥺🥺
Sending you the biggest virtual hug! I wish I could do more!
As sad as it is I know they will have some sense of relief knowing they’ve made their wishes known, I guess it gives them some control in a really heartbreaking situation 😔
We are all here for you ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you @thelurker66 and they have been fighting cancer for the 4th time and they are just so fed up now. Totally agree with you too babe and thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️
 

thelurker66

Member
Feb 28, 2024
3,559
32,617
113
Thank you @thelurker66 and they have been fighting cancer for the 4th time and they are just so fed up now. Totally agree with you too babe and thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️
Yeah I can’t even imagine how exhausted they must be, see it as one less do you to cancer, they’re going to on their own terms and not when the cruel illness decides ❤️❤️❤️
 
Apr 27, 2024
37
315
53
Middle of no where
@Muggle can you do tomorrow at all babe as just had a call about our relative being rushed to hospital with another suspected heart attack 😭😭 They have taken them to whiston hospital for some reason too 😣😢
On route to the hospital now as been told we have to go in. Only found out last night the cancer has spread even more in the liver

Also think me and hubby are going to have to cancel Barcelona which I’m not bothered about because family always come first. Don’t even care if insurance don’t pay out either for it.
I’m gutted about today and will update you all later xxxxx
Oh no I'm so sorry to hear this @itsmedvlajo Whiston holds painful memories for me as well. Fingers crossed all is OK with your relative. Sending my love xx
 
Apr 27, 2024
37
315
53
Middle of no where
Hey everyone, not got all blood results back yet as waiting on TROP T levels. They think the new chemo drug has caused this and the reason they took them to Whiston is because the cancer specialist is based there. H/R is fluctuating between 133-160, Sats are 64% and B/P sky high too.
I can’t say who the relative is because it would give away who I am but they have just signed a DNR as advised it would be detrimental to them and would have no life with the damage it would cause. They weigh 40kg and literally just skin over bones 😢😭
Tbh relative is saying they will discharge themselves and if they are going to pass they want to be at home 😭😭😭
Oh no, the DNR....my nan and dad both signed one at Whiston, heartbreaking. I was floored, even though I knew it was for the best. My Nan wanted to go home but only lasted a few more hours. My dad was far too poorly to even be let home but did have some extra days with him.

I'm so sorry Jo, big massive hugs. I forget sometimes that people are closer to me than I think, I often think people in my phone are from London or Glasgow etc and not just 20-30 miles away. ❤️❤️
 

Muggle

Member
Mar 8, 2024
294
2,669
93
Hey everyone, not got all blood results back yet as waiting on TROP T levels. They think the new chemo drug has caused this and the reason they took them to Whiston is because the cancer specialist is based there. H/R is fluctuating between 133-160, Sats are 64% and B/P sky high too.
I can’t say who the relative is because it would give away who I am but they have just signed a DNR as advised it would be detrimental to them and would have no life with the damage it would cause. They weigh 40kg and literally just skin over bones 😢😭
Tbh relative is saying they will discharge themselves and if they are going to pass they want to be at home 😭😭😭
Oh Jo, that's awful. I don't understand the numbers tbh, but obviously not as they should be. Big virtual hugs ❤❤xx
 

thelurker66

Member
Feb 28, 2024
3,559
32,617
113
@noseyneighbour
I’m going to repeat what I said on the other thread slightly but in more detail.

I’ve noticed today you’ve been so negative about yourself, feeling as though you’re a burden and that you are causing us grief.
I promise you, none of us have ever thought anything of the sort, you seem like such a lovely kind hearted person, I’ve spoken to you everyday for months apart from when you vanished, I know old habits die hard because he drummed some negative thoughts into your head, but honestly that’s not what people are thinking.
You are just overthinking.
And before you apologise, I don’t want to hear it because there is no need for one.
Put a smile on that face woman, behave yourself with your negative comments about yourself, you are not any of those things ❤️
 
Mar 8, 2024
2,275
12,579
113
@noseyneighbour
I’m going to repeat what I said on the other thread slightly but in more detail.

I’ve noticed today you’ve been so negative about yourself, feeling as though you’re a burden and that you are causing us grief.
I promise you, none of us have ever thought anything of the sort, you seem like such a lovely kind hearted person, I’ve spoken to you everyday for months apart from when you vanished, I know old habits die hard because he drummed some negative thoughts into your head, but honestly that’s not what people are thinking.
You are just overthinking.
And before you apologise, I don’t want to hear it because there is no need for one.
Put a smile on that face woman, behave yourself with your negative comments about yourself, you are not any of those things ❤️
I don't know why but this has made me cry (and yes I feel pathetic saying that..my view)
It's taking me a while to write as a result.
I literally burst into tears...probably because know u are right. My self-esteem is in it's boots and I guess I hide behind joking and trying to be funny to mask it. (As many of us probably do)
I think..for me.. it's a self-protection mechanism I do...i think I do it a lot off group in my life. Like I will say what i think everyone may be thinking so I'm agreeing or owning it..if that makes sense!
I also think because of A's toxic traits...I and prob others are worried they will come across like her so over explain and apologise.
I've been this way for a long time...from my childhood and everything that happened from trauma and the most un-maternal mother! Then staying in that marriage for 20 years..then healing for 5 years, but then ending up in another toxic relationship is just ridiculous. I'm torn tbh cuz I am realising what the last 2 years have done to me, but on the other hand i miss him...which is ridiculous. In a shallow way...i miss the affection and closeness that was there some of the time.
Today..thinking I cudnt get back on group and catastrophising and over reacting...completely threw me. I guess I need the group and you all more than i realised (sobbing again)
The connections made, mutual support and care goes beyond my hate for A.
I guess I need to be liked and accepted more than I realised.
Many would relate to this..but it makes you think..why am I not enough for people to like/love for who I am. To betray...get taken advantage of or wanted for the wrong reasons.
I am def a little do up and I'm very aware of my demons but I am a very genuine, honest and caring person naturally and anyone that knows me would agree. My mouth gets me in trouble sometimes. It just leaves u vulnerable I guess.
All that fing therapy and u are back to square 1. Like what is the thought..the fear...emotion..evidence for feeling that etc etc.. I find it very difficult 'in the moment' to get clarity.
My daughter does a lot for me in a practical sense and loves me in her own way I think.. but can be very critical and brutal and it hurts. She knows I have her back and always has but she is not one for kind words or cuddles. Not sure why. Birthdays and Xmas cards bring me to tears what she says in them (nice things) but she can't articulate them like I can.
I also think he (partner) isolated me from a lot of people so I cud give him everything all the time and now I feel alone. I have some amazing work colleagues/friends of varying ages and they are so supportive and emotionally mature but u just don't want to be a burden. I am always there for all of them too..whether it's advice, a hug, check in messages or examinations lol.
Telling an overthinker not to overthink is never gonna work as u know yourself.
I appreciate you alot and for this message.
It had an instant emotional/physical reaction which I think was the release I probably needed.
I promise everything I say is the truth and from the heart and you are completely right about talking daily for months. We are all anonymous but most of us can seek out the good hearted genuine people on here.
I don't think I have used the word sorry in this rambling message but I have been a pain..panicking and over reacting etc today and i need to own my s.
Anyway...thank you. It really does mean a lot. I've given myself the predictable headache from getting upset but I prob needed a good cry. I have been doing a lot better with regards to him and no contact as the triggers have reduced.
Thank you 🥺❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ xxx
 
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