Jack Monroe - Bootstrapcook

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@BootstrapCook

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R to @BootstrapCook: (And before the usual suspects get here, I’M FINE, just wanted to huff into the void for a moment!)

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @CassInTheAttic: Bloody mortgage-free inherited bungalow Cass, literally no good reason for it. Going to enjoy watching it idle on the market forfuckingever though, they were pushing it at £1500, nobody’s surely daft enough to pay £20k a year to be cold right to their kidneys

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @Wadey1977: I’m praying for a legal eagle to tell me that the space right there between the comma and the 6 means my rent is actually £1 a month. I’d even consider staying for that 🙃

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @HoppoDS: I’m on what feels like our umpteenth flat application, we have been besieged by a litany of disasters (side-eyes Liz Truss and Kwasi Kwarteng for casually screwing over renters and first time buyers for about the next decade…)

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @alistaircoleman: Ah that’s what my energy bill did. I opened it and actually shouted. I literally put the heating on ~when I’m in agony~, probably cheaper to just set fire to the money at this point and huddle around it

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @suey2y: Rent plus CT plus energy is the same here - £2500. On a single freelance writers income - with a teenage boy who seems to grow out of his shoes on a daily basis at the moment and perpetually snacks like a locust swarm… SUCH FUN

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @KeithAdamTaylor: At this rate it’s probably cheaper to set fire to a pile of fivers and huddle around it than it would be to turn the fecking heating on

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @alistaircoleman: I reckon the tallow in those fivers would make them burn up a right treat and all

(Impatiently awaiting the shrieking from certain quarters about That Awful Jack Monroe Bragging She Has Money To Burn… aaaany second now… 🧌)

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @onetakegray: Apart from the ‘2 years worth all at once’ that I just did yeah? Must have overlooked the Royal Mail Festive Special where they let you post massive heavy bundles of 250ish thick postcards halfway across the world for free, was there a flyer advertising it that I somehow missed?

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @suey2y: Hahaha to be fair when I worked at my local nightclub many moons ago I would sometimes pick up a reduced cooked chicken from the supermarket on the way there, stash it in the fridge, and idly snack on it as I walked home about 4am. Eldest has impeccable (if infuriating!) taste 😛

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @BootstrapCook: Also - props to the rest of the household for not waking up to the wafting seduction of a freshly roasted hot chicken… SB would have been out of bed like a shot 😌 That and frying bacon are like an instant summons: he just appears in the kitchen as soon as it’s done 🙃

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @suey2y: Oooooh, Stealth Chicken. Maybe that’s the key to actually getting some for myself without the entire household menagerie congregating around the cooker… Bloody cat literally stole bacon out of the frying pan last week, hooked it out with his paw, the adorable greedy scoundrel…

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @roshingler: Haven’t increased at all, it’s a mortgage free inherited property. Rent is going up because the *value of the property has gone up*. Make it make sense.

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @PeterSt35237312: Peter this tweet is so heartbreakingly stoic and simultaneously utterly enraging. Any compassionate society should be looking after its pensioners a damn sight better than leaving them to warm up on buses and beans. Can I do anything to help?

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @Omaherdis: Tentatively, but it’s been a litany of disasters so far so I’m really really really hoping THIS one works out for us. Timeline is getting uncomfortably tight now, I don’t like it 😔

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @GeorgiLoveland: Not til the ink is dry on the new gaff - given the litany of disasters I’ve had so far I’m not taking the risk of ending up with nowhere to live… be ok if it was just me, I can kip anywhere, but String Bean and Very Large Pupper and big grouchy cat might not be impressed 😝

 
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@BootstrapCook

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R to @BootstrapCook: I had a property inspection yesterday - think the floor to ceiling boxes next to the loo might have hinted that I may not be renewing the tenancy 🙃 I’ve got the notice date in my calendar - not having stalky weirdos yomping through my home a day before I absolutely have to…

 
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@DovForman

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RT by @BootstrapCook: Kalman Fried, born in Romania, was murdered in the Holocaust in Dachau.

I am privileged to be able to continue Kalman’s legacy by lighting his Chanukia, at Yad Vashem.

Almost 80 years on from the Holocaust, we are seeing the Jewish community flourish and spread the light.

 
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